Pairing

Giving the clitoris extra pleasure during penetration

Better Together

Adding clitoral stimulation to penetration is like having milk with cookies: both are good, but they're so much better together. That's what Pairing is: a woman or her partner touching her clit while she's being penetrated--both are happening at the same time. For most women, the result is far more pleasure and better orgasms!

Perspectives

Kate — “A total game changer”

Leslie — “The hurdle”

Shiraz — “It's a party”

Why is Pairing so Great?

More and Better Orgasms

Only 18% of women have orgasms from penetration on its own. Compare that to 73% that orgasm by Pairing (adding clitoral stimulation at the same time). And the resulting orgasms are more frequent and more pleasurable.

Kim

“The right ingredients”

1+1=3

When they happen at the same time, clitoral and internal stimulation can actually amplify each other. They add up to more than the sum of their parts: bigger, fuller and more satisfying pleasure and orgasms.

Perspectives

“With soft motion on my clit before and then during penetration, it creates a double-whammy: the feeling of being cared for and the thrill of being explored.”

Techniques

Pairing Techniques

Jess

“Double circles”

Angie

“An electric addition”

Making Room to Reach Down

Previous generations usually thought of “sex” only as a penis going in and out. So the “sex positions” they handed down to us only took that into account. But now that we know 4x as many women come by Pairing, isn’t it time to rewrite what makes a good sex position? The research shows the best positions make room for fingers or a vibrator to get into the action at the same time.

Her Hand on Clit

Partner's Hand on Clit

Her on top, leaning back enough so there’s room for a hand on the clit

Her Hand on Clit

Partner's Hand on Clit

Her on top, leaning back enough so there’s room for a hand on the clit

Soft On the Outside

Many women say the best Pairing is when, each time the clit is approached, it’s touched with gentle, warm-up kinds of stimulation. This can be easy for a lot of partners to forget in the heat of penetration.

Angie

"Two different rooms"

Guiding a Partner’s Penetration

Another bonus of having hands in the action is being able to give nonverbal signals to partners about how to adjust the penetration style.

Leslie

“Matching the penetration”

Fun to Try: Two Kinds of Orgasms at the Same Time

Maybe once or twice in a lifetime, a unicorn appears: a clitoral orgasm and an orgasm from penetration at the same time. The few who have done this several times talk about a technique called Double Edging: getting close to clitoral orgasm and backing away, then right to the edge of an internal (G-region or Deep End) orgasm and backing away again. By repeating the cycle, you can try to time it so both orgasms to erupt at the same time. It’s hard to achieve but fun to attempt!

30%
of women have had two kinds of orgasms at the same time

Angie

“Hands free”

Perspectives

“Just penetration feels good but will not lead to orgasm for me. Just clit stimulation can lead to orgasm but it is not as full body feeling. Together, it’s this huge pleasure that puts me over the top.”

Bringing it to the bedroom

Helpful guidelines

Redefining ’Sex’
Women sometimes write to us, concerned because they don’t orgasm during sex. The problem is most often with their definition of ‘sex’ as penetration on its own. Because 4x as many women orgasm with Pairing, we think it’s time to redefine ‘sex.’
Partners, Show Her You Love It
Our research showed that a partner suggesting the woman stimulate her clit (and vocally enjoying when she does) was the most helpful thing for women to move past fears and get into Pairing.
Pairing Partners = Better Lovers
Of 2,000 women who shared an opinion about it, 97% said partners who give attention to their clitoris by stimulating it during penetration make better lovers! NINETY-SEVEN PERCENT! If that's not an incentive to try Pairing, we don't know what is.

Most common challenges

Unlearning Assumptions
It can be hard to shake old assumptions, like that touching one's own clit while with a partner is “masturbating” or somehow disrespectful to the partner. It’s worth realizing neither of these are based in fact! They’re just old ideas from previous generations that haven’t been good for anyone.
Coordinating Can Be Tricky
Unless you’re a professional drummer, trained to do two different things at once, it can be tough to sync up the two movements when Pairing. That can be really frustrating for women who like one soft and the other hard, or different speeds. Solutions: use a vibrator, have each partner do one, or practice practice practice!
Bringing it Up
If Pairing hasn’t been a part of a couple’s routine, it can feel uncomfortable to bring it up for the first time as something to try. A great strategy for either partner is to just take your partner’s hand during penetration and guide it to the clit, holding their finger, and beginning to rub it there.